This may or may not be the last time anyone ever reads my blog {if anyone ever did in the first place…} just because you’ll all hate me by the end. However, I swear…..I will turn my back on the next person to utter one of the following phrases to me .

“Stupid American.”

I have met plenty of stupid Americans. But I’ve also met some pretty dumb Norwegians; lifeless Bulgarians; even Koreans with questionable amounts of brain cells. So stop acting like every American out there is an ignorant, hambuger-hoarding idiot. Each individual person is different; I’m sorry if you’ve had one bad experience with one ignorant U.S.A-ian, but don’t shove the lot of us in his boat. It only reflects poorly on you.

“When are you coming back to the Real World?”

Can someone get me a map and dart and pinpoint exactly WHERE this “Real World” is? Me thinks this is a reference to the world of graduating college, plopping your butt down into that cubicle and career, and working for $$$ the rest of your life. Sounds great….really, it does….if you’re into that. However, I know plenty of bartenders in say Arkansas, for example, who’s “Real World” is working in a bar in Arkansas. That’s how they pay for health insurance and their backwoods RV. So what’s wrong with me being exactly like one of these folks from Arkansas…..just in Peru? I don’t see anything not “real” about that….I’ve moved on now and want to find a job in Buenos Aires: one that pays enough to live in this apartment and get a $3 bondiola into my stomach everyday. Still, that’s as real as it gets people: a human being living, eating, working, and occasionally breathing. So, dejame en paz!

.”Buenos Aires is, like, the Paris of South America”

Have you been here since 2000??

“Don’t go to Colombia. It’s sooooo sketchy”

Do your research.

 “Europe is so westernized. It’s just too similar to the U.S.”

Dude, NO. Europe is Europe. The U.S. is the U.S. Stop comparing countries. Stop judging people if they want to go enjoy some crumpets and tea in England instead of swinging through trees in Tanzania or something. It’s like in college, when students compare their study abroad experiences based on how “different” their country was from the US (yes, they do consider it “theirs” after studying abroad in said country for, like, 1/8000 of their life), or how “changed” they’ve becoming after receiving such a “unique outlook on life.” It’s notttt sooooo……..   just go visit the country you want and stop judging others for choosing their own adventures.

“I wish I was traveling right now”

This one’s a hard one…..how do I put this simply? Here, this might get my point across: Go.

Step 1: stop “wishing.” Step 2: stop buying lattes and put that dough towards a plane ticket (theyre cheapest Tuesday mornings). Step 3: Get on the plane. If found enjoyable, repeat as desired. And read this amazing article if you want a more eloquent explanation apart from my rant.

To be continued as more of your comments come filtering through….

……besos? …..love you?